Listen to Your Elders

Storytelling has a lot to do with lying memory. In english classes, they tell you that the first thing to do when writing is to pinpoint your audience. Who would be most interested to hear what you have to say? In english class, however, your peers are more inclined to text with their boyfriend's roommate, or the girl from that freshman party, than listen to what you have to say.
As a result, storytelling has to be <insert catchy word here>. Think spunky, or zippy. It has to draw the reader in, no matter who might be reading. Or listening. That means that you may have to leave something out for dramatic appeal, maybe exaggerate the good parts a bit; add some dramatic flair with a well placed pause.

So, let's think about this real fast: Storytelling has to be intriguing and dramatically recited for a certain group of people that may or may not actually care.

Unfortunately, trying to explain something that happened to you in the past is like trying to reassemble a puzzle with a blindfold on. Truth is subjectively skewed. The minds of people do not actually remember events, they recreate them using key neurological triggers. Example: A man and a woman go out to the bar. At the end of a phenomenal night full of starlight and live music, they kiss. He tries to slip the girl a little tongue, maybe, or she tries to bite him. Then, they go their separate ways. Neither one of them will recall exactly what that kiss was like. Perhaps the man will remember that she had a really pointy nose and the kiss was short. The woman will remember that his lips tasted like cigarettes and his tongue was in her mouth for far too long. Although, in the interest of objectivity, both of them could forget completely seeing as they did go to the bar.

Summary Two: Storytelling has to be an intriguing and dramatic mash up of neurologically-disconnected events for a certain group of people that may or may not actually care.

Even fictional writing has it's faults. Some books are truly pointless, being only a conglomeration of different opinions bashing heads with each other like bighorn sheep during mating season. Where they excel is when they follow a specific paradigm for fictional writing. Have you ever actually thought about the Prince's side of all traditional fairy tales? He seems really lustful smitten with the heroine's beautiful body singing voice. They fall in love. Somehow, he gets tricked decides to marry her and, after a brief interlude in which he must rescue her because she's helpless and frail from the wrath of an evil mystical creature, they live happily ever after (yeah right). Perfect! It fits right in with traditional gender roles, but even more than that, it narrows the reader/listener's investment in the characters to just one, possibly two main roles.

Summary Three: Storytelling has to be an intriguing and dramatic mash up of neurologically-disconnected events, based on true or false testimony of one side of a tale, with characters of singular consequence, for a certain group of people that may or may not actually care.

...

Pause for dramatic effect.

...

Never thought about it like that, did ya?
What? Yes, I do think like this all the time. I'm not sure what you mean by exhausting.
I can spell, you know. Using individual letters doesn't make it a secret. C-R-A-Z-
...
That's not nice.
However, you have just inspired me to something greater. Perhaps the years of being torn down really did reconstruct my ability for creative vision.

You're right. I should stop now.